Most if not all of our lives are spent in states of spiritual unconsciousness. We grow up with little clue as to the true nature of our realities. We don’t understand who we are, or what our abilities might truly consist of. We really don’t. We believe we are in control, and we battle to control what little we have control over, until finally we realize we really aren’t in control of anything. And this generates much pain and suffering and sadness and anger and regret, and we take that and we aim it at others only to have it boomerang right back at us, and ruin the very existence we were trying to improve in the first place.
When I was a kid, I experienced all of this unconsciousness just like Larry King and Brandon McInerney did. I battled through unconscious existence with most of my friends and family. Only, unlike Larry, I survived my unconscious childhood, barely. Before his tragic demise, Larry had suffered so much pain at such a difficult time in his life. He was fifteen, battling everyone and everything to understand who he thought he might be, and he battled for acceptance in his very home for the very same reason, and he lost that battle too.
Same with William McInerney. His lack of consciousness haunted him until his 47th year when it stole his life through a thick fog of booze and opiates and blunt trauma to the head. But not before this man showered his world with violence in temper and hateful, angry thoughts. His emotions raged out of control. He shot and abused his wife. He sired a child and raised him as best he could, which meant spreading his violent lack of consciousness through his offspring.
Nicholas Markowitz was riding the unconscious highway to extinction before reaching his sixteenth birthday. He was upset at being unable to live life as he saw fit. He battled to control who he was, and what he wanted out of life. Same for his brother Ben, whose unconscious spiral through drugs and violence and alcohol toward his own aborted death instead triggered the chain of events that led to his brother’s murder, and the near destruction of his family, all in the name of unconsciousness. Ben’s chief antagonist, Jesse James Hollywood, and all those who went down with him in a hail of bullets and prison and destruction, guys like Ryan Hoyt, Jesse Rugge, William Skidmore, and Graham Pressley, also spent their entire lives in unconscious states.
Unconsciousness also landed Tyler Edmonds in prison for five of the most precious years of his life, from 13 to eighteen years of age. And you know what? Tyler will never get those years back, one of the sad costs of unconsciousness. Through his ordeal, however, Tyler did gain something even more important. Something that’ll help him survive and probably even thrive during these very difficult times in life. It’s called awareness. Tyler has become aware of who he is, and he has awakened to his very presence. He has begun to understand that this moment, right here and right now, as it stands in his life, is all he’s got. It’s all any of us ever really have, although most of us don’t realize it yet.
When I speak of unconsciousness, I’m talking about a condition that affects us all at some point in our lives, and most of us throughout. We are born into the Garden of Eden, so to speak. As children, we are but reflections of the Kingdom of God. Our minds do not run incessantly, tormented with anger and hatred and stress and anxiety from thoughts and obsessions with past and future times that we have no control over. As a child, our negative emotional body has generally not developed enough to take over and control our every thought and move. Our egoic mind has not formed enough to try to control what is not controllable, segregate us from all that is, and fill everything we do with a negativity that will paint an unfortunate reality around us. It takes time to develop these negative, conditioned qualities.
As young children, most of us have not yet been conditioned away from our natural state of Being, this connection to the Divine, this God consciousness. Yet, with a little time spent with dysfunctional parents, controlling government, manipulative religion, and a null-and-void educational system, we begin to identify ourselves as separate from others. We believe we are different. We watch too much media, play too many video games, and assume every act in life can be redone through a reset button. We are socially conditioned to judge and label and build prejudices against certain colors, looks, and ways of life. This is ego out of control. This is unconsciousness at its most powerful and negative influence. This is who we are. This is how most of us run our lives on a daily basis, through ego-driven unconsciousness. This is how I spent many years of my life, and so did you, whether you want to admit it or not. And you probably still are right now as you read this.
The conditioning we are raised with colors everything we do. It taints what should be our unadulterated appreciation for everything that surrounds us at all times. It makes us want to be somewhere else or someone else, or hate or envy others for very selfish reasons. I was lucky. I found a crack in my dark existence that peeled away to light and I’m now able to write about these experiences. I survived my difficult time as a child, and now I can write about those experiences as well. Guys like Larry, Brandon, William, Nick, Ben, Jesse, and Ryan, however, never really had the chance to see themselves in this light. They were operating in a world of darkness where family and friends were wearing unconscious blinders along with them, and nobody could show anybody how to act or where the light was because no one could see it. That’s why they’re all in prison, now…and worse.
FINE LINE BETWEEN VICTIM AND PERPETRATOR
There used to be a joke running around the office that said there’s a fine line between a lawyer and a liar. The same could be said about the fine line of unconsciousness between victims and their perpetrators. The negative pull from one attracts the negative emission from the other like moths to a light. The negative energy from one feeds the negative body inside the other, which grows with negativity, causing us to do things we never would if we had a clue to our conscious abilities. Consciousness begets consciousness. And in the same light, or shadow, unconsciousness breeds its like energies. If these unconscious patterns go undetected, they can be passed down from one generation to the next, with the unconsciousness seemingly growing greater and greater until crisis destroys the victim, or helps to stir them awake. This is where Tyler Edmonds finds himself now. Awakened to the reality that peace and love do not exist from operating through a perpetually negative emotional state. Awakened to the understanding that the energy he generates now through thought and emotion and sensory perception – his present consciousness – will continue to feed his ultimate reality.
Tyler will never find himself in legal trouble again because of this newfound awakened state. And this is what I pray we can accomplish with each and every unconscious person who we find spinning out of control in a world filled with anger and hatred. People like Tyler Edmonds will prove to one and all that all it takes is a little time and effort to transform oneself. It’s a process, not a quick fix. And it’s never too late to start. This begins by putting the past behind us, as Tyler has done. It continues by never worrying about what might take place in a future we have no control over. This is when we begin to realize that all we have, for better or worse, is what we’ve generated for ourselves right at this moment. And now’s the time to be grateful for all that is. To set aside conditioned reactive patterns that generate negative personal reality. Become the change that we want to witness around us. And this can be done for all of us, at any time, right now.